Rob Lambert.com

So, seven years ago (December 1999) I wrote a little novelty country Christmas song. The drawing to the left is a fine self-portait that I did of myself when I wrote it. After I wrote the ditty, I recorded a version of it, but that version is long gone. I whipped out a new version last Friday after work.

You can download the song here: Holidaze-2006.mp3

Here’s the lyrics:

Holidaze by Rob Lambert

Please baby, baby save me from this craze.
Booze me up, drug me up & leave me in a haze.
What I need right now is a great big buzz that stayeeeees.
Oh put me in a coma for the holi-holidayeeeeees.

Oh yes the weather outside is frightful.
And those shoppers are far from delightful.
And if those carolers come here, they'll be met with a rifle.
Just put me in a coma, for the holi-holidayeeeeees.

Oh Santa Claus is not comin' to town.
At least our chimney's one that he ain't comin' down.
Let's skip Christmas this year and have no concern,
Cause in just 12 months it's gonna return.

Oh deck the halls with nothing because I will be numb,
On whiskey, vodka, beer, Coca-Cola and rum.
I'm gonna have a party, and not a soul can come.
Cause I'll be in a coma, for the holi-holidayeeeeees.

Oh Santa Claus is not comin' to town.
At least our chimney's one that he ain't comin' down.
Let's skip it this year and have no concern,
Cause in 12 damn months it's gonna return.

Oh hush that stupid bell, cause I can't spare a dime.
Cause I threw in a dollar when I passed you last time.
And I just spent the rest here on a case o' Milwaukee's Best beer-eeeeer.
I'm gonna induce a coma for the holi-holidayeeeeees.

Oh Santa Claus ain't comin' to town.
At least our chimney's one that he ain't comin' down.
Let's skip it this year and have no concern,
Cause in 12 damn months it's gonna return.

Please baby, baby save me from this craze.
Booze me up, drug me up, leave me in a haze.
Please put me in a coma for the holidayeeeeees.
Oh put me in a coma...for the holi-holidayeeeeees.

© Copyright 1999 Rob Lambert

I hacked that thing out in 45 minutes in GarageBand. Here’s the lineup:

me: rhythm guitar

me: bass guitar

me: wicked fuzzy guitar solo

me: breaking beer bottles

GarageBand JamPack Rhythm Section: drums

me: vocals

me: drunk guy yelling (I only had two beers so I guess that I was only pretending to be drunk)

Enjoy!

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